The End

Hello everyone!

I am finally blogging again, not going to lie it has been a long time. Honestly, I want to blog all my ideas, and of course I always think that they are not good ones. On to add I hardly have time... school has been my life. This blog is just going to be anything that my fingers type of what I am thinking. If you do not know sometimes my blogs names are from the song's I am currently feeling. 

"I can't keep breaking up with you. You messed with my heart babe now it's black and blue, but love isn't fair. And I swear, that this time this is end. And I can't keep lying to myself. Oh I'm thinking you'll love me right, but you never will." - Little Mix

Do yourself a favor and check out this song, this song is amazing. These lyrics just hits me in the heart. This song isn't released yet but only the acapella versions on YouTube. This song just speaks the truth.

Not going to lie this song came out on perfect timing for me, the song made me open a path that became clear to me. Every girl has that one guy (ex- boyfriend) that either reaches out to them or the girl will reach out to that one guy. Like 2 months ago an ex-boyfriend reached out to me. At first I thought it was like the most random and awkward thing.. When he texted me in my head I was thinking "What the hell? Why did this just happened." We texted for a while that day, and then like 2 days later he texts me again. All I was thinking in my head " I don't understand what is going on." After those text conversations no one texted anyone no more. A week later I see him at the university, why does happen to me I ask myself. 

We talked to each other face to face for a while, and guess what happens we bumped into to each other at the university again. Turns out that our paths cross to reach our next location. After this kept happening we talked in person,then text messages restarted, then we progressed to phone calls. Yes it was like old strangers getting to know each other again. It got to the point we started to hang out again, and yes we ended up kissing. We all know after this it leads to more kissing, not going to lie it was great having this. One day we were hanging out, and he did something (never going to say) that triggered a memory (not a good one). That's when it happened to hit, that I am chasing memory but it's fading. After a relationship we have all those memories with that one person, and we never want to let go. In my previous blog he was the good relationship, and short story the break up was a mutual thing. The thing that hurt like 4 or 3 months later he gets himself a new girlfriend.. We have all been here when we think of the memoires.. in my case when he got himself a new girlfriend I started to remember all the memories and small things which felt like daggers in my mind. 

It just made me realize I can't keep putting myself in this position and like go through a break up again. Deep down I still care for him and I want the best for him.. but after remembering he got a girlfriend after our break up really hurt me and made me sad. It is like if I take him back I am accepting the cracks he left in my heart and saying its okay. 

End of story I need to accept their is a reason why we broke up, and I have to keep my heart from getting messed with. I guess me and him can stay friends. okay, it is getting late and I need go to school tomorrow.

-Ginny